Contrary to popular misconception, you don’t have to be “crazy,” desperate, or on the brink of a meltdown to go to therapy. At the same time, therapy isn’t usually necessary for every little struggle life throws your way, especially if you have a strong support system of friends and family. Most people can benefit from therapy at least some point in their lives. Sometimes the signs are obvious—but at other times, something may feel slightly off and you can’t figure out what it is. So you trudge on, trying to sustain your busy life until it sets in that life has become unmanageable. Before it gets to this point, here are five signs you may need help

1. Feeling sad, angry, or otherwise “not yourself.”

Uncontrollable sadness, anger, or hopelessness may be signs of needing assistance. If you’re eating or sleeping more or less than usual, withdrawing from family and friends, or just feeling “off,” talk to someone before serious problems develop that impact your quality of life.

2. Abusing drugs, alcohol, food, or sex to cope.

When you turn outside yourself to a substance or behavior to help you feel better, your coping skills may need some fine-tuning. If you feel unable to control these behaviors or you can’t stop despite negative consequences in your life, you may be struggling with addictive or compulsive behavior that requires treatment.

3. You’ve lost someone or something important to you.

Grief can be a long and difficult process to endure without the support of an expert. While not everyone needs counseling during these times, there is no shame in needing a little help to get through the loss of a loved one, a divorce, or significant breakup, or the loss of a job, especially if you’ve experienced multiple losses in a short period of time.

4. Something traumatic has happened.

If you have a history of abuse, neglect, or other trauma that you haven’t fully dealt with, or if you find yourself the victim of a crime or accident, chronic illness, or some other traumatic event, the earlier you talk to someone, the faster you can learn healthy ways to cope.

5. You can’t do the things you like to do.

Have you stopped doing the activities you ordinarily enjoy? If so, why? Many people find that painful emotions and experiences keep them from getting out, having fun, and meeting new people. This is a red flag that something is amiss in your life.

You may have great insight into your own patterns and problems. You may even have many of the skills to manage them on your own. Still, there may be times when you need help—and the sooner you get it, the faster you can get back to enjoying life.

Have you been questioning if you need couples therapy? It’s been a difficult year for many couples, regardless of how healthy their relationship was before the start of the pandemic, so if you’re wondering if you need couples therapy, you’re not alone

Of course, relationship challenges are a normal part of daily life, and even the most loving couples have their ups and downs. But if you’ve really been struggling lately, you may want to consider couples therapy to help

Signs You Need Couples Therapy

Whether there’s a relationship issue that you’re currently dealing with, or you’d simply like to improve communication with your partner, couples therapy creates a safe environment to explore your concerns.

If you aren’t sure if couples therapy is right for your situation, here are some common signs that it’s time to schedule a free consultation:

1. Loss of Trust. Is your relationship in crisis mode? If there’s been a breach of trust, it can be difficult to heal and move forward in the relationship. This can be one of the most painful and damaging relationship injuries to overcome. Trust is often lost when one partner doesn’t respect an important relationship boundary. In this case, we often think of physical or emotional infidelity, but there are other ways trust can be lost. Couples therapy can help re-establish a sense of safety within your relationship.
2. You’ve Drifted Apart. Sometimes couples shut down as the result of a traumatic event, but other times it’s just the stress of daily life. While we may not think of it in those terms, the pandemic can be considered a traumatic event. If your conversations seem surface level lately, or you’ve emotionally or physically drifted apart, couples therapy can help you reconnect.
3. Arguments Threaten the Relationship. If you notice that you’re having more arguments, or that you seem to be rehashing the same disagreement over and over again, couples therapy can show you how to break unhealthy communication patterns.

All couples have the occasional spat. We get angry, the kids are whining, or work is stressful. But if your communication (or lack of communication) has begun to feel destructive to the relationship, it’s important to consider new solutions. No one is perfect, but conflict shouldn’t break down into tearing each other apart.

A good therapist can teach you techniques to better resolve issues with your partner. If there’s lashing out, passive-aggressiveness, or stonewalling in your relationship, those are key signs that something needs to change.

Brain Working Recursive Therapy (BWRT) is a one-to-one talking therapy that gives you the tools to reprogram your emotional or habitual responses, through the power of your thought alone.

It uses natural psychological processes to recondition neural pathways in the brain that lead to unwanted behaviour. By stopping and rerouting the brain’s natural response to anything traumatic or not understood in its tracks, BWRT can prevent the negative outward symptoms of conditions like depression and anxiety.

A counselling session traditionally consists of 50 minutes. Sessions normally last around an hour but can extend over that time especially 1^st appointments where a lot of background information is collected. Couples sessions often extends over an hour to an hour and fifteen minutes.

Sessions are billed per hour @ 125 incl GST. Unless therapy is funded through ACC/Benestar/WINZ

Good therapeutic results are often seen after about a dozen sessions, and greater results still after two dozen. A sense that your therapist understands you is a prerequisite for improvement. You want a therapist who intuits your feelings and thoughts, one who demonstrates his or hers by using specific examples, such as proposing what you might be telling yourself to get upset. Such a therapist functions as a collaborator in your life, a person with whom you can assess your ideas, feelings, and goals.

More important, a good therapist helps you learn to make these assessments on your own. You can become a better therapist to yourself—if you have a method, a theory of self, and you feel confident in your ability, you are growing and getting better.

Clients who like their therapists, and in turn, are liked by their therapists, tend to improve more quickly than those who do not have a so-called “therapeutic alliance.” If you identify with someone, feel understood, and have help processing your experiences, you will take the behavioral steps that can improve your life.

What to Look For in a Therapist:

• Keep shopping until you feel comfortable with someone. You should believe that they understand you and that they are helpful.
• Trust your own sense of whether someone is helpful.